Duchess Bune & Why Most Women Think Being Feminine Is “Weak” + Solutions

Femininity has acquired a terrible rap in Western Society. I had a long think on this as I was chopping some veggies to place in my Lasagna that I was baking today 🙂 Cooking is always fun!


The West is a cesspit of mentally ill people parroting their opinions on gender relations and roles.


One of the blessings of walking a Spiritual path, is honouring the Feminine inside myself and instantly identifying behaviours, dress sense, mannerisms, and, things otherwise that lend a strong air of wrongful masculinity to a woman’s aura. We have very few role models of Femininity, what it is to be a woman, and, how to go about it in a society that openly rewards masculine behaviour of aggression, strategy, and, risk taking. This is a trickle down effect from the Draconian and Orion races that have injected their venom of control and domination by grabbing hold of the human men first, and then spreading the chaos around.


Most women live in the Masculine because they are frightened of everything.


When you have a massive sword drawn infront of you, the defensive energy alone puts a man off and he runs. Sometimes, for your own safety as a woman, it is necessary. Most of times, it isn’t.


Women have been slowly brainwashed without their own understanding to look and behave like a man. It is so embarrassing for today’s common modern woman to behave like a lady, because anything ladylike is considered helpless, fragile, weak, and, pathetic. Women have been taught to hate themselves. Most women will not admit this (and even to themselves…) but they see femininity as outdated, disgusting, and weak. Yet, something inside them constantly hankers and cries because they KNOW they have walked away from their own divine spirit. A woman can be self-sufficient and feminine at the same time, although it takes a while to adjust to it (been there, done it) and allow herself to possess the three major traits that Femininity comprises of. I will do my best to deconstruct these from an Occult standpoint that is also remarkably useful when we look at money matters, equally.


  1. Surrender
  2. Softness
  3. Grace


Without much surprise, if you possess ladylike behaviour in society, you will stand out as a woman and also have a bevy of people who are highly suspicious and fascinated at the same time. Today’s modern woman in the West for the majority of part, is simply a shame to anything womanly. She is uncouth, vile, cheap, narcissistic, selfish, self-centered, entitled, badly behaved, and, behaves low class. She speaks of the things men often refer to, and with more vigor and venom — because she has herself to prove. I wish I didn’t have to say this — but truth, is as such.


We only have Feminism to thank for this. A movement started for a good cause, completely gone haywire. Outside the West, Feminism still has meaning. In the West, it gives people a free pass to be a bitch and state that behaviour, with pride. I have done tremendous work with Duchess Bune, Spirit of Femininity, Aristocracy, and many other sparkly wonders — to really understand what it means to be a poised, put-together and well mannered woman.


Let us explore these 3 pointers to see how they work 🙂


Surrender is giving up control. When you, as a woman, are in control of your own life — it can be exceptionally challenging to still maintain that control over yourself, your emotions, and know when to hand over the keys to your man to drive (so to speak). I mean this at a metaphorical level. The Feminine is by nature, calm. Anxiety is atypically a masculine trait because masculine energy requires to control and direct the flow or something, anything. You can be accomplished, driven, and, successful — and yet this means little if you’re unable to surrender and allow a man to just BE himself in your presence. Surrender is peace. It is happiness. It is allowing the wave to crash at the shore in it’s own time and going on Divine Time. There is a certain level of weight that drops in the body, when you surrender. It makes for pleasant energy and something is enjoyable 🙂


Surrender is exceptionally powerful because it allows you to be a woman, with dignity. 


What is Softness?


This is a hard world for everyone. We all have so much going on, the world is not kind to us in general and doesn’t cater to the part where we desire love, peace, and, bountiful affection — be it a man or a woman. In order to survive, as I mention before, a woman has to harden up, or calcify, as I call it. I have experienced this and only that hardening got me through some of the worst parts of my life. I probably would have died had I remained soft in that place. It also gave me the mettle, grit, and, courage — I possess today, so on that side note; I am proud.


However, there comes a point where the storm wrecks up everything, leaves, you heal and rise into your power — and then you’re require to pair up softness with surrender. Softness is the ability to be receptive and feel emotions, no matter what they may be. We are shamed (especially women) that we are far too emotional and we cry all the time. Good.


I personally don’t trust any person who doesn’t cry regularly — that is a ticking time bomb waiting to happen. When you’re gentle and soft with yourself, you are able to be patient with others. Many women of today have so many demands and pressures placed on them, that softness is simply not an option left anymore. There is a gentle feeling to softness because a woman who possesses softness can be exceptionally bold, and yet there is always a caring warmth and sweetness in her voice — generous with her affections, her hugs, and, the ability to allow people to feel LOVED. Softness, for me — is all about LOVE.


Love is not just romantic, it is the ability to curate PRESENCE in another person’s life and be a space of safety minus JUDGEMENT. Beauty is also about softness, the feminine is kind, caring, and, sweet. This, however; is required to be paired with healthy esteem in order to protect yourself.


Moving onto what I see immediately that has been moulded out of most women — is Grace.


Grace, is a quiet appreciation and honour of the Feminine within. It is a certain sense of poise and charm that is fluid, limber, and, patient. Grace is a slow movement, it is a timeless elegance that is charming, pretty, beautiful, and celebrates — all things Venus. Many women have been sold a lie that they more masculine they behave, the more they are appealing to men. This is a strange notion. When a man behaves in a feminine manner, women are put off by it, not turned on. The same goes for women behaving manly.


Feminine women, no matter how successful, never feel the need to shout about their achievements, accolades, or how much they did or what they made. All that is masculine behaviour. Femininity, in essence — is graceful because it is quiet and has a certain sense of “unavailability” and glamour that is challenging to place into words.


And yet, Duchess Bune always reminds me of these same things — repeatedly.


Where does a woman enroll to learn true femininity? What happens when all the makeup, accessories, and perfume, is not enough? What happens that no matter how great you may present yourself as — every word that drips from you is competitive, argumentative, and, a fight? How can a woman balance Lioness Independence with a humble divine beauty? How do you balance the Light and Dark Feminine natures? Where can you discover refinement from and furthermore, what is it? What if you do not have access to thousands to invest in a Finishing school? Where does the moon shine on your manners in public and how can she be glorified?


In olden days, women were fortunate. We were all sent to finishing schools whether we liked it or not (!) to enter society properly and this is a tradition that can only be reserved for Pedigree or women of means, in today’s age. Being Feminine, is an incredible amount of strength where most women feel it is not viable or do-able for them to fully access and relish in their emotions.


Femininity has SHADES. These 3 pointers are about traditional femininity and yet, it is exceptionally important for a woman to also honour the dark feminine, the part inside her that stands up for herself, other women, other men, Justice, and, Freedom. When I worked on embracing Occult Feminine Consciousness inside myself, I found a new level of respect for myself as a woman that I had never been taught.


Femininity is freedom, to be yourself, the best of what a woman can be — a loving woman who can embody any role given to her. 


Femininity is true self-respect for a woman.


Duchess Bune’s wisdom — click here to discover more


Bune’s Ladylike Charm Rose Pendant — available here