Codependency, is when you are willing to work on someone else’s problem, more than THEY are.
I should know this story well. I always loved helping people reach their true NORTH STAR, but not in Spartanite fashion. In a disempowering way.
In an effort to avoid my OWN SELF, I would see where I could heal, help, and fix people.
I made a promise to myself one night that I would never heal and fix anything or anyone, UNTIL I had some semblance of normality in my own life that I could share with other people. Sparty helped me do that by showing people that they too can heal their emotional wounding, and rise into their power the way I did. Sometimes, you never quite know how broken and damaged you are, until someone who has done their emotional work points it out to you and you’re left feeling confused, angry, humiliated, and ashamed HOW you didn’t KNOW this about yourself.
“How the hell can this person see what I can’t? And that too, about myself…”
At the point many things fell apart for me (looking back, they were falling together #winning) — I was a totally broken shell. The djinn spirits that had made my life a living walking hell, that were attached to me, had left me and each day was harder than them being in my life. I had to find what NORMALITY looked like, one I had never KNOWN. I remember I knew I needed serious help when a client just asked me to correct one tiny thing in an e-mail and I cried for 3 hours non-stop after it. He only asked me to re-write a sentence but the trigger showed me what needed to be healed. Codependency goes hand in hand with childhood neglect, trauma, abuse, and perhaps in your adult life, the machinations of attracting distant, cold, moody, and otherwise emotionally unavailable people. You do everything to please everyone ELSE, except yourself. You’re running and jumping to just keep people in your life.
Through that year, going back and forth between trying to find some financial stability, the woman who provided warm counsel to me, was thankfully also a psychically gifted individual and to boot, a sorceress. Although her brand of magick, different to what I would take on in the years to come (which is where I am today), she gave me many words of comfort in a lonely, and dark place where I had no one who understood me. I see this loneliness in many people’s eyes, some as successful as a prized catch in the cold sea waters, but deep isolation where despite all their evidences of material success, they don’t have a single person they would TRULY feel themselves around and loved, by.
I know that codependency ALWAYS shows up in WAITING to be chosen by others, which is why I am a FIERCE advocate for SELF-VALUE AND DEEP REGAL SELF-CARE.
I want to make this clear to anyone who knows me personally, who comes across Spartanite at events, online, or even flights where I may have handed out my card after requests, and you keep up with me, CHANGE IS AN INSIDE JOB.
You cannot change ANYONE except yourself and why waste any energy of yours, trying?
Healing co-dependency is exceptionally simple. You’re not putting anyone else onto ANYTHING, till you are giving it to yourself.
I will never forget the time Clauneck said to me “Please do not expect your friends or clients to gift you anything, till the Universe has seen you gift yourself regularly. Do not expect a man to show up with a beautiful bunch of flowers if he feels in his heart, YOU FEEL undeserving. You are teaching people how to treat you every single day of your life, by what you’re accepting, tolerating, and rejecting. The Universe mirrors what YOU are, back to you”.
As Lady Astarte, Queen of The Canaanites, Wife of King Asmodeus, Goddess of War, &, Sexual Love always says to me “Be a friend to yourself, value yourself. What would you expect your friend who loves you, to do for you, Nadia? Then go ahead and do just that!”
Remember, you are your own best friend and if you were in possession of a Diamond, you would take great care of it, value it and prize it.
Well, you’re the Diamond.
Why aren’t you treating yourself as such?
All the bezels, cuts, facets, and shine, lie within you.
For SERIOUS mentoring inquiries, spiritual/business consultations, writing projects and custom ritualistic work, feel free to reach out to me for assistance.